I need to buy more stage shirts.

I clean up good, even if i remain dirty inside.

This, for example, is what used to be called a “seagull”:

Now it looks like a floating piece of diarrhea. Thanks BP, you fucking ASSHOLES. How are those 760 safety violations treating you?

Here’s a brown pelican, still brown but not in the same way:

Poor thing is just coated in that shit: here’s a list of what the oil does to birds:

Oil that sticks to fur or feathers, usually crude and bunker fuels, can cause many problems. Some of these problems are:

* hypothermia in birds by reducing or destroying the insulation and waterproofing properties of their feathers;…
* birds become easy prey, as their feathers being matted by oil make them less able to fly away;…
* birds sink or drown because oiled feathers weigh more and their sticky feathers cannot trap enough air between them to keep them buoyant;…
* birds lose body weight as their metabolism tries to combat low body temperature;
* birds become dehydrated and can starve as they give up or reduce drinking, diving and swimming to look for food;
* damage to the insides of animals and birds bodies, for example by causing ulcers or bleeding in their stomachs if they ingest the oil by accident.

I edited out the stuff about seals, which is just as disturbing.

here’s another bird, this one probably the saddest picture of all:

I want every goddamn BP executive in prison, preferably on a death row in Texas, where they hand out trips to Ol’ Sparky like penny candy. And when they are executed, I want it to be aired on national TV during prime time. After they’re dead, the heads should be displayed on 20′ pikes in front of the New York Stock Exchange.

FUCK YOU BP, FUCK YOU TONY HAYWARD, YOU SHOULD ALL COMMIT SUICIDE FOR RUINING SO MANY HUMAN AND ANIMAL LIVES.

I’d say it’s shades of George Bush Senior’s discovery of the supermarket grocery scanner, but at least he had an excuse: they were kind of new back then. I don’t know how an adult of Nelson’s age manages to miss the whole “atm” thing we ordinary people have used for nearly 30 frikkin’ years. But then I did some research, and maybe it makes sense.

After all, this is Ben Nelson’s i-pod:

And here’s his cell phone:

Senator Nelson is an avid mountain biker. Here he is on his top-of-the-line bike:

I spoke to Nelson’s staff and they assured me that the Senator DOES stay on top of technology. And to prove it, they emailed me a picture of Nelson’s new i-pad. Here he is sending an electronic letter:

here’s his microwave oven:

Recently Ben Nelson had his supporters out for a $2,000 a plate fundraiser. Here’s where they went:

The car in the middle is Nelson’s

I could go on like this all day. You should see his self-composting toilet… but seriously, remember how just yesterday (and the day before that, and the day before that..) I pointed out that our political and media elites are so far out of touch with the daily lives of ordinary Americans they may as well be from another dimension? Ben Nelson’s ignorance of the ATM -”I’ve never used an ATM, so I don’t know what the fees are. It’s true, I don’t know how to use one.”- is a classic example of problem. This is a guy who’s going to cast a vote on capping ATM fees and he knows NOTHING about them. And, amazingly, his staff tried to tell me that a lot of people don’t know how to use ATMS. That’s almost certainly a lie, but even if it was true, MOST PEOPLE AREN’T HIGHLY PAID US SENATORS WHO ARE EXPECTED TO KNOW A THING OR TWO ABOUT HOW THE COUNTRY OPERATES.

I can haz compeetents pleez?

“Under the leadership of Secretary Salazar, we’ll employ new technologies that reduce the impact of oil exploration. We’ll protect areas that are vital to tourism, the environment, and our national security. And we’ll be guided not by political ideology, but by scientific evidence. ”

“Ultimately, we need to move beyond the tired debates of the left and the right, between business leaders and environmentalists, between those who would claim drilling is a cure all and those who would claim it has no place.”

And thank you too, President Obama.
And by “thank you”, I mean “fuck you.”

…and from the front:

The best part is that when I washed out [most of] the pomade, it left me looking like David Tennant, which Christina just loves.

I think this one is pretty fuckin’ awesome.

Specifically:
Phillyist Framed 2010 Opening Reception
Studio 34 (4522 Baltimore Avenue)
Friday, January 29th
7 – 9 p.m.
FREE!

Be there!

My brother Ray has an entry. Hope to see you there!

My brother called me this afternoon to tell me he’d finally completed resizing some of his recent photos of Sam, which i hope you’ll all enjoy.

But before you scroll down, let me put in a plug for him. Ray’s photo skills are top-notch, and it is a crying shame that he hasn’t been hired by either of our daily newspapers, even as a freelancer. His attention to detail and his eye for composition are sharper than a straight razor, and he’s always exploring new techniques. If you like these shots, and would like similar photos of your kids or event, feel free to contact him via his website or at sceneinphilly[AT]yahoo[DOT]com. I don’t know what his rates are, but they’re almost certainly very reasonable. As you’ll see, the photos Christina and I took do not compare in the slightest.

The following photos were taken over the course of 2008 and 2009, but honestly I’m not 100% sure of the dates except for a few. They’re pretty big, and I’m not about to resize them all a second time, so if you want an unobstructed view, click on each individual shot.

I’m pretty sure this was on or about New Year’s Day 2009. Or maybe 2008.

I love this shot because Sam’s buddy Franklin looks like he’s promising a chicken in every pot, and the rest of the boys look like his entourage. Franklin for president!

The two shots above are of Sam and his cousin Elliott (Ray’s youngest boy)

Speaking of Sam and Elliott, here are a few more shots of the two boys:

As I’ve mentioned before, due to some incredibly bad scheduling on his Mom’s part, my last long visit with Sam ended on July 18th. With the exception of his visit to the US a couple of weeks ago, my only contact with him has been at great personal expense to me, requiring trips to Canada, hotels, etc etc. So there aren’t that many summer shots. Here are a few:

I really like this shot. There’s something very wistful about it that speaks to an outsider sensibility I know has been sown in Sam. He’s different from a lot of other kids his age, because he has to travel all the time. His mom is younger than a lot of other moms of kids his age. He also has a tendency to do his own thing, and I know he has some budding concerns about where he fits in with his peers.

Ok, the goggles are just funny. So is Sam the mob enforcer:

That’s all I have for now. Hope you enjoy them!