Shorter Anne Applebaum: “Waaah!”
Anne Applebaum is always a fun read, because while she’s known for her focus on foreign affairs, her conclusions usually boil down to “Waaaah!”. And man does she cling desperately to last years metaphors and campaigns.
Writing today in the steaming pile titled Old Europe’ Can Gloat, but Then What?, Apples writes:
BERLIN — On the day James Baker’s Iraq report was published, I gritted my teeth and waited for the well-earned, long-awaited, Franco-German “Old Europe” gloat to begin. I didn’t wait long. “America Faces Up to the Iraq Disaster” read a headline in Der Spiegel. In the patronizing tones of a senior doctor, Le Monde diagnosed the “political feverishness” gripping Washington in Baker’s wake. Suddeutsche Zeitung said the report “stripped Bush of his authority,” although Le Figaro opined that nothing Baker proposed could improve the “catastrophic state” of Iraq anyway.
What Anne sees as “gloating” the rest of the world sees as “reporting the news.” Whether Anne likes it or not, whether Mr. Bush likes it or not, the Baker Study INDEED stripped Mr. Bush of his authority: he’s got the support of 20% of the electorate, tops, and probably more like 11%. And whether Anne likes it or not, when “Le Figaro opined that nothing Baker proposed could improve the “catastrophic state” of Iraq anyway” they were expressing something called “objective fact”, something that Iraq War supporters like Applebaum really need to get back in touch with. Funny, how it’s “gloating” when Le Figaro says it, but Anne has nothing when when Colin Powell and the Joint Chiefs of Staff say it. Why is that, Anne? Is it because that it’s easier to make fun of “Old Europe” than it is to admit you were wrong?
Anne continues,
And then, for two weeks . . . silence. If there are politicians, academics or journalists anywhere in Germany and France who have better ideas about how to improve the catastrophic state of Iraq, they aren’t speaking very loudly.
You’ll pardon me as my jaw drops in exasperation that someone this obtuse is on the pages of the Washignton Post. I’ll type… very… very… sloooowwwwlllyyyy… Perhaps the reason no one is “speaking very loudly” is that there are no ideas, better, worse, or otherwise, for dealing with Iraq except for GETTING OUT NOW.
But what is MOST hilarious to me is that now that the US finds itself in a pickle of our own making, which included alienating allies like France and Germany by calling them “Old Europe”, Anne continues with the insults while wondering why no one wants to help pick up the pieces. Hey Anne, you forgot Poland: they’re from your “New Europe” that already left us in Iraq, along with Bulgaria.
But let’s get back to this “Old Europe” nonsense that Anne insists on clinging to, like her Don Rumsfeld teddy bear. “Old Europe” has unfortunately seeped into our national vocabulary the same way “Democrat Party” is used consistently by Conservatives and Republicans as a passive aggressive barb. It’s the same thing as giving someone an unflatering nickname and expecting them to embrace it. Let’s try that experiment.
Let’s say I know someone named… oh, let’s say Anne Applebaum. And let’s say I give her a nickname that she doesn’t like. How’s about I call her “CuntFace Mcgee”: that’s pretty offensive.
So I have this tree in my backyard, and I decide I need to prune some branches. But Anne, who has some experience pruning trees, points out that I’m going about it all wrong. “Brendan,” she says, “Don’t saw off that enormous branch over your stained glass skylight. Not only will the falling branch break the glass, but you’re sitting on the branch itself, and by sawing it off, you’re gonna fall like 50 feet and break your leg.”
“Whatever, CuntFace McGee,” I say. “CuntFace McGee, you don’t know anything. You know why? Because you have a face that looks like your cunt! So back off bitch!” (Not that I would ever talk like that). And I go along merrily on my way, sawing off branches. Then disaster hits: just like my neighbor warned, the branch crashes into my skylight, I go plummeting into a garbage can, and break my leg.
“AAAAGHHHH! My leg, my leg!,” I yell. “Hey CuntFace, come help me out! I’m stuck in a garbage can with a broken leg, help me out CuntFace!”
No answer.
So I yell louder, “Hey CUNTFACE! CuntFace, where the fuck are you? You know, this downed limb is dangerous to your house too, especially if the whole tree dies and falls over. Then where will you be CuntFace, huh? Awww, c’mon CuntFace, what’s the big deal? Help me out here!”
Can you see how Anne might have a problem with helping me out? And how I have a problem not recognizing that I’m still alienating my neighbor?
Maybe now the Germans, and even the French, will finally come to realize that there is no alternative to the transatlantic partnership, no better international military organization than NATO, no real “role” for any of us outside the Western alliance — even if only because all the alternatives are worse…
Shorter Applebaum: The US fucked everything up, but you have to fix it. Cuntface.
Applebaum closes with the following:
Ultimately the only way for the West to deal with the new threats posed by a disintegrating Iraq, a resurgent Iran and a shattered Middle East is through a unified policy — an alliance whose members are not easily played off against one another…
It is as if she doesn’t even realize her own role “playing off against one another”, as if a foreign affairs columnist for the most important newspaper in Washington DC has no effect at all on anything. Why, she might as well be writing horoscopes for the Springfield Penny Saver!
The lack of self-awareness is as astonishing as it is dangerous. Behold the finery, the depth of thought, that is American Punditry!
December 19th, 2006 at 8:36 pm
Brendan,
I believe the report has quickly become irrelevant other than a political tool. It’s shortcomings are stark and glaring. Just the simple fact that there was not one military person involved and instead, Sandra Day O’Conner. Who really believes that O’Conner knows anything about Iraq?
The makeup of those involved with the report doomed it to irrelevancy.
December 19th, 2006 at 9:57 pm
Who gives a fuck what you think, asshole?
You don’t even have the balls to post under your real email, and you go around calling my girlfriend a “lemming” and a “moron”?
Get the fuck out of here, dickface.
December 20th, 2006 at 2:11 am
Do you think a foreign affairs correspondent had a lick of influence in whether or not we went to war in the first place? Prior to the recent elections, President Bush didn’t listen to anyone other than Cheney or Rove, it seemed. He may still not, but someone on his staff knows that getting a military appropriations bill held up by an unfriendly Congress is too much a humiliation to risk.
And sure- there might not be any military input into the Baker report. I don’t think that’s a bad thing. Every military man and woman I’ve worked with strike me as motivated, task-oriented people. Give them a job to do and it will get done well and quickly. That can-do attitude works well, except when the job shouldn’t have been done in the first place. I’ve seen some well done expensive clusterf*cks by ex-military networking people.
Like the really nicely organized cabling, top flight network closet and high end Cisco geared network closet put in when a few users wanted a more reliable network.
Unfortunately, this was in a building that we weren’t going to renew the lease on in a few months.
I don’t think you can use the same kind of thinking that got you in a problem to get you out of one.
December 20th, 2006 at 4:35 am
“Do you think a foreign affairs correspondent had a lick of influence in whether or not we went to war in the first place?”
well, yes and no.
No, in that I’m actually chuckling at the idea of dick cheney and george bush conferring: “Well, that strike on Anbar sounds good… run it by Anne Applebaum, see what she thinks.”
Yes in that she’s a “serious” “respectable” writer on the pages of the washington post who certainly has done as much as anyone else to spew blather in support of what I think we all agree is a pie-in-the-sky agenda, and like so many others has never admitted her errors.
This latest column, mired in cliches from 2003, amplifies my belief.
December 20th, 2006 at 5:01 pm
I found your metaphoric tale both accurate and entertaining.
December 20th, 2006 at 5:04 pm
Why do these Right wing whiners (”‘whingers, if you will) always insist on war critics offering alternative solutions? It’s not like the war is their problem. They didn’t start it. And the absence of alternatives to “stay the course” in no way undercuts the fundamental criticism that the war was wrong from the outset and that the US utterly failed in its objectives (other than overthrowing Saddam, of course).
December 20th, 2006 at 5:12 pm
Liked the post. But feel like I missed some nuance of the conversation between you and Mr. Dickface.
December 20th, 2006 at 5:22 pm
Also, “Glueckliches Neujahr” is hopelessly unidiomatic German. Maybe “Schoenes Silvester” would be appropriate, but the phrase she wrote just doesn’t make much sense.
December 20th, 2006 at 5:22 pm
[...] PARTICULATE MATTER CLINGING TO THE TENDER LININGS OF MY AIRWAYS. Other than that, I mean. Permalink| [...]
December 20th, 2006 at 5:23 pm
In the tale, you forgot that the clown in the trash can would sue his neighbor if he did come over to help out, and that they both know it.
December 20th, 2006 at 5:40 pm
I think that it is unbelievable that this jingoism passes for commentary on foreign policy. This is some serious malpractice.
December 20th, 2006 at 6:12 pm
As horrible and instructive as your tale of woe is, the reality is still worse. You, in your parable, recognize that your idiotic course of action has brought disaster upon you, and call upon your neighbor for help.
Bush does not seem to recognize that at all. It’s as if, having hauled your broken body out of the trash and once again climbed the tree, you now insist on going out on an even larger limb to saw that one off behind yourself too.
And Applebaum is still pissed off at your endearingly-nicknamed neighbor (for being right all along) and wants to see the neighbor not only give you a hand but magically come up with the Big Idea that will Make Everything All Right.
Which can’t be done.
And which, if history and character can serve as guides, you would loudly and fiercely reject anyway.
She’s really good, isn’t she? Journalism — gotta love it.
With kind regards,
Dog, etc.
searching for home
December 20th, 2006 at 6:51 pm
Germany is gloating.
Germany is being played off somebody else (probably that bi-gendered person who came second in the 800 for India)
The EU would be smart to offer the US some sort of overall support, hint hint, but they’re too self-contered, too caught up in all that EU stuff.
http://www.dailykos.com/story/2006/12/8/95134/7615
December 20th, 2006 at 7:02 pm
My name for her is:
Grace Appletree.
It is very respectable and seems to go well with her smiley, googly picture at the top of the column. No, there are columists and there are columnists, but this one is in a class of her own. In a way she even dares to outdo Miss Dowd.
December 20th, 2006 at 7:04 pm
“Hey, CUNTFACE!” is going to randomly pop into my head all day like the fragment of a song. Thanks for giving me a reason to grin on a gray day.
December 20th, 2006 at 7:11 pm
Frankye: not that I would ever use that kind of language of course, but glad I could help!
December 20th, 2006 at 7:27 pm
Cuntface McGee.
Too funny.
Milk shot out my nose, and I wasn’t even drinking milk.
Applebaum just goes to prove, once you squat on some editorial page inches, they are yours, no matter what kind of special needs jr. high cognitive skills you demonstrate in your writing.
Somebody send Ol CF McGee to the war zone asap.
December 20th, 2006 at 7:36 pm
Sir, I am offended by your blog entry, sir.
Your tone is histrionic, barbaric, insulting, unflattering, and darnit, downright rude.
All that, and spot on.
December 20th, 2006 at 7:46 pm
Hmmm. Needs a bit of “And it’s all the fault of the Iraqi people” to make it really tasty.
December 20th, 2006 at 7:55 pm
Since you’re busy parsing her words to attack her, might I note that you say the ISG report strips Bush of all his authority. I’m not exactly clear on how that happened. I’m pretty usre that the ISG haad no legal authority to make any change — only to make recommendations. Also, if you mean something like moral or political authority, I rather doubt that the poll numbers were much influenced by the ISG report. Everybody all ready knew that Iraq is FUBAR.
OK, so the U.S. really screwed everything up by not listening to our allies. If they’re gloating over this disaster they aren’t exactly great allies. Friends try to help friends out of a jam. She has a point here. Of course, the way out of the jam might be to exit, but one might ask if there would be better options if our friends wanted to act like friends. The ISG report proceeds on the premise that the U.S. is alone on this. What’s wrong with asking why this is so - and calling so-called allies to the carpet? More importantly, why are you devoting this space to slamming this stupid column?
December 20th, 2006 at 8:00 pm
Holy Hilarious Batman!
You’ve just become my new favorite blogger!!
Whew!
You Rock!!!!!
December 20th, 2006 at 8:03 pm
Hey, if you don’t think it was such a good idea, how about you suggest a better way to saw a limb off behind you.
Nothing? Then that just proves everything he did was right all along.
December 20th, 2006 at 8:04 pm
She also forgets to mention that Germany and France are providing troops and supplies to man the Blue Line in Lebanon and to interdict seaborne smuggling. The US response to the Israeli incursion into Lebanon was to ship them more cluster bombs so the IDF could really leave a lot of reminders in the Bekaa Valley.
This means the US has more troops to commit to Iraq. This also does not mention the German troops in Afghanistan, also freeing up US military resources.
The rightwing response is that the French will shoot down Israeli planes and that German naval units are tracking the Israeli air force to warn Hizbullah.
Yes, those Old Europeans certainly are a thankless lot. Look at what a great success we had in Lebanon recently.
December 20th, 2006 at 8:19 pm
FF:
“Since you’re busy parsing her words to attack her, might I note that you say the ISG report strips Bush of all his authority. I’m not exactly clear on how that happened.”
What I mean is that the publication of the report basically made it plain to the American Public that the president’s “plan” isn’t working, and that everything he’s said to date has been wrong. And the evidence of this is right in front of your nose: republicans jumping ship left and right; 11% approval ratings; the whole “listening tour” which (ridiculous and fake as it is) would never have happened before; prominent Bush supporters like Russert, Roberts, and more jumping ship; NRO’s eidtor Rich Lowry jumping ship… it goes on and on.
“If they’re gloating over this disaster they aren’t exactly great allies.” But they’re not. That’s what makes AA’s column so retarded.
“Friends try to help friends out of a jam. She has a point here.” No she doesn’t: her article can be boiled down to “hey cuntface, help me out!”
“What’s wrong with asking why this is so - and calling so-called allies to the carpet?”
These allies told us from day one that this was going to be a failure. They never joined in the “coalition”, but now they’re somehow to blame for our errors, to pick up our mess? that makes no sense. “call them on the carpet”? for what? What will we say: “you never supported this from day one, and that’s bad enough. But now you won’t help us clean up the mess we made without your help, and that’s worse”?
“More importantly, why are you devoting this space to slamming this stupid column?”
Because it’s my blog, and I can do what I want here.
December 20th, 2006 at 8:37 pm
i liked where you were going with this…too bad you had to use cunt, an extremely insulting expression for a woman…couldn’t think of anything less, ummm, idk, female hating? comes across as immature rather than clever. there is nothing negative about a female body part aka vagina/pussy/cunt until you use it that way. other than the bitch and cunt parts, i am in agreement, but next time you want to call someone out on their stupidity and foolishness, how about refraining from female body parts in your critique, you lose credibility with the rest of your female readers, well, at least one of them. picky female reader - maybe, but also trying to call out the use of putting a woman in her place by designating girly parts as a negative. again, you are trying to insult her thought process, right?
December 20th, 2006 at 8:39 pm
Laughing uproariously and forwarding this blog. Great work!
December 20th, 2006 at 8:40 pm
MDR: “Hey, if you don’t think it was such a good idea, how about you suggest a better way to saw a limb off behind you.”
I did. And so did “old europe”.
That better idea, now supported by the majority of Americans, including the former secretary of state was “don’t invade Iraq”.
It didn’t get a lot of attention, so you might have missed it.
December 20th, 2006 at 8:41 pm
As far as I’m concerned, “press” in this country is an acronym for “Propaganda Resources Energetically Spewing Shit.” Or “Propaganda Resouces Engaged to Support Slimeballs.” Or any number of things. No, Anne Applebaum doesn’t surprise me. That anyone still takes Pravda on the Potomac seriously — especially given their nonstop slagging of the Clinton Administration vs. their support of this criminal regime — does.
Oh yeah, and Brendan isn’t far off the mark in his assignation of nicknames. (Remember when the P.R.E.S.S. was creaming itself over li’l Georgie giving them all nicknames? Like, how *cute*!) Anne Applebaum is a Republicunt. It’s the proper scientific name for all female Conservatrash. You’re welcome.
Happy War on Christmas, y’all.
December 20th, 2006 at 8:44 pm
i’m going to be anyone who wants to a million dollars that somewhere in “old europe” some academic has suggested a solution to the iraq crisis over the past two weeks? and that applebaum just wanted to make a point and didn’t bother to use google, or lexis/nexis, or her rolodex of contacts (remember those?), or indeed made exactly zero attempt to ascertain the relative merits of her fact claim?
because, you see, having an op-ed column is an explicit carte blanche to just make shit up.
cuntface mcgee would be the perfect name for her except, unfortunately, for its inherent sexism. i would have gone with cumstain mcgee myself, but hey, everyone’s a critic.
December 20th, 2006 at 8:46 pm
Anonnie: I could have called her “dickface”. Or “shithead.” I was going for the most bang for the buck, not so much the theoretical part.
Crude, but no apologies either.
December 20th, 2006 at 9:09 pm
Some dear readers are offended, which indicates only that they’re irony challenged. The French and Germans were offended by “cheese-eating surrender monkeys” too. Morons! You’re meant, by this elementary ironic device, to empathize with other offended folks. Have you even heard of Swift?
December 20th, 2006 at 9:10 pm
brendan–
it doesn’t matter “what you were going for”. the word “cunt” has connotations that exist whatever your intended use. if you throw it around you are playing into sexist memes and that isn’t really subject to argument without becoming REALLY FUCKING BORING. and the rest of the post is REALLY FUCKING BRILLIANT, so maybe a change would be worthwhile.
i was listening to thom hartmann’s radio show this morning, and a caller made a point counter to Thom, and after listening for a bit, Thom took it on and corrected himself. it was…bracing.
December 20th, 2006 at 9:19 pm
…[there is] no real “role†for any of us outside the Western alliance…
I don’t intend to re-read all of her crap, but I don’t recall anything *remotely* like this sentiment in 2003-5. I could almost live with the bullshit in the present if these jackasses could at least acknowledge when they were proven wrong in the past. Something like “I have now realized that there is no real role etc”, rather than pretending that this is what they’ve thought all along.
December 20th, 2006 at 9:22 pm
You were asking for trouble using “CuntFace,” some of which has already tracked you down, but otherwise this is a great parable.
I really think you, and the rest of the first-tear liberal bloggers, ought to lay off the high-octane profanity. All it buys you is a little notoriety — “Hey, he’s willing to be un-P.C. to attack Anne Applebaum.” Is it really worth it?
The problem is not only that it undermines the point you’re trying to make, and makes some of us herbivores uneasy, but that it leaves no room for your commenters to escalate. If you’d said “BoneHead McGee,” by now some commenter may have worked his/her frothy way up to “CuntFace.” But when you start with “CuntFace,” where can they go?
Besides, is “Old Europe” a calumny on the scale of “CuntFace?” I don’t think so either.
December 20th, 2006 at 9:31 pm
First time here. I’m really only stopping in due to the fact you have a post on Anne Applebaum. You see, I hate Anne Applebaum. And Anne’s now officially written her worst column ever. Which is really saying something, because it’s Anne Applebaum we’re talking about here. A lady who should be writing for the Style section at best. Oh, and she should at least have the decency to flush after she’s done using the Post’s facilities.
December 20th, 2006 at 9:32 pm
Green says, ‘the word “cunt†has connotations that exist whatever your intended use.’ There he does grasp the nettle of sarcasm. When Swift modestly proposed that the Irish eat their babies during the famine he intentionally went outside the cultural pale. And no doubt many of those offended by such an outrageous suggestion had never experienced the slightest emotional rise from the famine’s victims. Green himself uses the word “fucking” twice, which to some would also be offensive. Probably a moniker like “fuckface” for example would not have elicited the proper response from Mr. Green.
December 20th, 2006 at 9:37 pm
Hilarious…I’m adding you to my read daily list.
December 20th, 2006 at 10:16 pm
Great take down of Ms Cuntface, Brendan. Your point is extremely witty and right on target.
I plan to come back later and read more of your replies to your critics who think ‘cuntface’ is going too far. As if it bore any comparison to the obscenity of Ms Cuntface’s advocacy for a war.
Once again, Great job!
December 20th, 2006 at 10:46 pm
“OK, so the U.S. really screwed everything up by not listening to our allies. If they’re gloating over this disaster they aren’t exactly great allies. Friends try to help friends out of a jam.”
Fuck off, you fucking cunt. I have no words to express how much of an utter utter cunt you actually are. If you had any idea how much I hate you and your pathetic insipid self serving nasty little world view you’d hurry up and kill me before I exploded from hating your moronic insane cunty-ness. CUNT.
December 20th, 2006 at 10:51 pm
hey idiots
read what i said. i didn’t say “going too far” in re cuntface. i just said it has a specific problematic connotation. surely this isn’t that radical a point, no? and yes, i used the term “fucking” for a reason, peter. you see, it is a term that grabs the attention without making a specific gender reference. “cunt”, as you may or may not know, has a specific reference to a part of a WOMAN’S anatomy. and anne appelbaum, funny story this, is a woman. and calling a woman a cunt, even a woman as stupid and over-compensated as anne, is just sexism plain and simple. funny thing is, calling a man a “dick” isn’t sexist. if this confuses you, it is because you don’t understand power. and are therefore probably a fucking idiot.
December 20th, 2006 at 10:55 pm
You forgot to blame the tree for not falling in a better way and for not reattaching the fallen limb in a timely fashion. Also had it grown properly, said limb would not have needed to be removed.
December 20th, 2006 at 11:30 pm
Richard (and others taken aback by my use of the word “cunt”):
First of all I never called AA a cunt. I used that name specifically because it was insulting, the kind of insult that if I used toward my neighbor in real-life would lead to a large fence being erected between opur properties.
The word is not a comment on AA, or even her execrable writing. The word is meant as a stand-in for “old europe”, the term the US (aka the man in the tree) used to describe germany and France (aka the neighbor). It’s an analogy, not a comment on AA herself, who for all I know is a wonderful, loving person with great taste in wine and movies (but who is horribly misguided in terms of whatever topic she chooses to write about).
AA’s article boils down to “why won’t those cuntfaces France and Germany help us outof Iraq??” My post spells out, in no uncertain terms, that referring to your allies as “cuntface” even as you are asking for help is a self-defeating notion, and that the first step in getting the aid of people you have insulted repeatedly is to stop lobbing insults at them. Perhaps I could have chosen “Doodyhead” or “Shitforbrains” or any other number of pejoratives, but I didn’t.
I write how I write, and if some of the words I choose to employ offend some people, that’s the way the cookie crumbles. Lots of things, like the unnecessary deaths nearly 3,000 American soldiers (and of hundreds of thousands of Iraqis guilty of nothing), offend me too. Sean Hannity’s big fat ugly face, is another. We all have our crosses to bear.
Peter at 32, and A Reader at 39 get it.
And by the way, if I haven’t said so yet, thank you, each and every one of you, for commenting today. Including those who disagreed.
December 20th, 2006 at 11:30 pm
Yeah, I hafta agree. The “cunt” reference detracts from the points being made.
December 20th, 2006 at 11:59 pm
I have to disagree. It doesn’t detract from the points because it’s part of the damn point.
December 21st, 2006 at 12:20 am
How pray tell is old Europe capable of helping us in Iraq? There are only two ways I can think of. 1. They can drag themselves out of bed in the middle of the night drive over to Iraq & give their sloppy drunk friend a lift home. This will not work since we insisted on driving in the first place and we need the car to get to work the next day. 2. They can lend us a few hundred billion till payday & then help us look for a vein that has not collapsed to stick it in.
December 21st, 2006 at 12:21 am
Only if one of the points is that Brendan is a sexist/adolescent.
December 21st, 2006 at 12:21 am
The use of the “C” word doesn’t bother me here. In repetition it becomes silly, but the point is made.
In an article decrying the “bad attitudes” of our “allies”, the writer uses pejorative terms towards them.
December 21st, 2006 at 12:26 am
Hey, all you wussy losers out there who are offended by profanity - go fuck yourselves.
December 21st, 2006 at 12:26 am
How about “Genitaliaface”, then people can imagine the first thing that pops in their heads. A Rorschach test, of sorts.
Personally, I like Cuntface. It is so offensive a word, even when one is not offended, that there is no mistake on how repulsive you find Anne Applebaum as a human being. Now, she is female (allegedly), so it is more appropriate than Dickface. Also, Fuckface has too many connotations these days with gonzo porn so it either looses its punch, or is equally upsetting to those with dainty constitutions and prone to fits of the vapors.
Yeah, Cuntface is right on target, and those fucktards who can’t handle it should try to get some perspective of what the fuck is being pointed out here — Anne Applebaum is a Cuntface.
Great column, BTW!
December 21st, 2006 at 12:27 am
You’ve actually accused Anne Applebaum(!) of disrespecting Europe — and invoked the “forgot Poland” line on her, of all people.
Appallingly stupid of you. But then, one suspects your consciousness of her sprang ex nihilo from the WaPo site, yes? Yes.
Emphatically yes.
December 21st, 2006 at 12:28 am
why is your comments section saying its December 21st?
December 21st, 2006 at 1:02 am
I’m accused by Josh Trevino of being stupid.
THAT is awesome.
December 21st, 2006 at 1:53 am
Anne Applebaum is a neocon. She used to write for some wingnut paper in UK. The WP editorial page hired her and she fit right in with the Fred Hiatt and the rest of the neocons who run the place. Hiatt like all neocons loves Eurobashing. He even made fun of 5000+ French who died during the heatwave a couple of summers ago.
December 21st, 2006 at 3:08 am
Dude…
You are on the front page of Dailykos!
Huzzah!!!!
December 21st, 2006 at 4:02 am
This was inspired and hillarious. I think I will substitute “shithead” for the original appellation, but other than that I loved it. Let me try it:
Hey shithead! Come fix my stained glass skylight!
Yep, I like it.
December 21st, 2006 at 6:14 am
umm,
nice to see all the foreigners writing in…
I gotta say that CUNT FACE is right…
for all the newbies:
B. Skwire is a master of obscenities– kind of like the father in “A Chrsitmas Story”
He can properly use “lick my balls” just as well as he can drop a hearty “CUNT!”
if you’re gonna be here, better get used to it…
December 21st, 2006 at 6:37 am
All of those fuckin ConTards can suck out eachother’s man-pussies. I piss on them all!
December 21st, 2006 at 6:37 am
I also piss on their mothers.
December 21st, 2006 at 7:10 am
Great commentary, Brendan.
To the first respondent:
It’s = It IS.
Its = Belongs to “it”.
Very simple English grammar. Don’t people learn anything in primary or secondary school anymore?
December 21st, 2006 at 7:17 am
c-hole just won the rude prize.
dude that’s nasty…
December 21st, 2006 at 8:58 am
I say we string up old CuntFace M, her pal at the NYT’s CankerSore T. (aka Tommy Friedman) and all the other dickheaded and cuntfaced MSM windbags up from the tallest Bahgdad palm tree or that bridge in Falluja.
December 21st, 2006 at 1:21 pm
I just want to add my little bit regarding those who can’t deal with the word “cunt.”
Yes, it’s offensive. Yes, it’s extreme. And that’s the goddamned point you dumbasses.
Brendan very patiently told you he was giving us a parable. The parable is about a dumbass who gets himself in trouble and then asks for help from his neighbor. But while his neighbor was telling him not to saw of the branch, the dumbass called him a coward, or traitor, or surrender monkey, or appeaser, etc. Those words, in the world of international diplomacy are the equivalent of calling someone a “cuntface” in the world of interpersonal relations. Do you get it now, dumbasses?
Jesus H. Fucking Christ!
Sorry to ruin your excellent parable, Brendan, by trying to explain the joke to the dumbshits.
December 21st, 2006 at 2:41 pm
Hysterical politically correct losers bring down the left as much as young earth end times folks bring down the right. There isn’t even that much difference between the two groups - Kos once linked to some advertisement featuring Paris Hilton eating a cheeseburger and everyone there lined up to cry that the world was coming to an end as foretold in Exodus by Saint Douchebag the PC dimwit.
December 21st, 2006 at 8:07 pm
“Joshua Trevino says:”
Oh man, smell the Shatner.
‘I.can’t.believe.you.disrespect.Anne.APPLEBAUM.’
‘Set.torpedos.to.wide.dispersion.’
Dum-da-dum-dum-da-da-da-DUM
etc.
December 21st, 2006 at 8:19 pm
I like ‘cum drunk fuck pony’ or ’spoo-chugger’ myself.
No, seriously, I get that ‘Cunt’ was used for shock value. I also get that it is sexist and, IMHO, therefore detracts from the force of the argument. Since her main problem is that she’s abjectly ignorant and not the sharpest knife in the drawer, how about ‘retard’… oh-oh, the special-needs lobby is comming to get me.
OK folks: how about ‘SHIT-FOR-BRAINS’ - I believe this is an apropro epithet, suitably insulting, and gender-neutral.
And, yes, Brendan, you might just *think* about accepting that you were *slightly* wrong on this one. I know you hate Crow for afternoon tea, but it’s not that bad…
T’was a good read, and coulda’ been slightly more spot-on with a nice gender-neutral slag.
That said, you’re all still TOO PC. OK, it’s insulting - call Brendan a ‘hald a prick’ or premature ejaculator or a ‘wimp’ (male equivilence to bitch, really) and get over it.
December 22nd, 2006 at 7:12 am
First time reading this blog, looking forward to reading more every day.
December 22nd, 2006 at 10:16 am
[...] This, by Brendan at Brendan Calling, is a lovely post with an exquisite target; also, therein is the best use of the word “cuntface” at least since Thomas Harris had a young Francis Dollarhyde in a flashback chapter cheerfully explain what the mean kiddies called him at school. [...]
December 22nd, 2006 at 11:43 am
He didn’t (hypothetically) call her a cunt. He called her cuntface. If you had a face like a cunt, I suggest you would be quite ugly. That’s all there is to it.
So taking up this issue is both wrong and, more importantly, missing the point. Nothing more needs be said on this aspect of the post, save by trolls.
December 22nd, 2006 at 2:06 pm
Let’s not forget that the leaders of France, Germany, Italy, Spain, etc. have their own constituents to represent, who are already none too pleased that they didn’t more forcefully tell off the crazy bully waking the kids with his yells of “Help! Cuntface! Bitch!” at all hours of the night.
Why that poor doddering neighbor Tony, always ready to lend a hand, has already been left by his wife and kids, now convinced he’s completely lost it, for holding the ladder, which promptly fell over and hit him on the head.
Sorry about all the commas, it’s still early here. And thanks for the hearty laugh.
December 22nd, 2006 at 3:18 pm
It’s funny because it’s true…
December 22nd, 2006 at 9:03 pm
I LOVE THE TACITEAN “EX NIHILO.” What a total choad. Ex choadibus! From many choads!
December 22nd, 2006 at 9:27 pm
I don’t object to the use of the expression cuntface in this post, it is a parable and I get it, but the point I think some people are trying to make is not that the word is a bad word so it shouldn’t be used, but the fact that equating a woman’s genitalia with an insult perpetuates anti-woman attitudes, and for that reason it shouldn’t be used. Brendan’s use of the term is appropriate, others in the comment section, not so much…
December 23rd, 2006 at 1:52 am
The people who are objecting to Brendan’s use of the nickname “cuntface” are just making his point. Since “cunt” is a word especially insulting to women, “cuntface” is an especially bad nickname to choose to call a woman whom you want help from. That was Brendan’s point in using it.
The problem isn’t with Brendan’s use of the word “cuntface,” it’s with the readers who want to show how earnestly respectful of women they are by taking a strong stand against the word “cunt.”
What a bunch of pussies.
December 23rd, 2006 at 3:03 am
#72: Dick, prick, cock, tool, tosser, hard-on, scrote, dickhead, schmuck…
See my point?
December 23rd, 2006 at 6:47 am
CUNT, CUNTY, CUNTING, CUNTLY, CUNTER, CUNTS!!!
….And the horse you rode in on!!?!!1
May 14th, 2007 at 7:50 am
[...] Tiresome war cheerleader Anne Applebaum = Frau Farbissina, shrill but loving mother of Scott Evil [...]